The Real Slim Shady

May I have your attention please?

May I have your attention please?

Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?

I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up?

We're gonna have a problem here



Y'all act like ya never seen a white person before

Jaws all on the floor like Pam, like Tommy just burst in the door

And started whooping her ass worse than before

They first were divorce, throwin?her over furniture (Ahh!)

It's the return of the...

"Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding,

he just didn't say what I think he did, did he?"

And Dr. Dre said...

Nothing you idiots! Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement!

(Ha-ha!)

Feminist women love Eminem

"{*Eminem's vocal turntable*} Slim Shady, I'm sick of him

Look at him, walking around grabbing his you-know-what

Flipping the you-know-who, yeah, but he's so cute though"

Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose

But no worse than what's going on in your parents' bedrooms

Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't

But it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose

"My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"

And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss

And that's the message that we deliver to little kids

And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is

Of course they gonna know what intercourse is

By the time they hit fourth grade

They got the Discovery Channel don't they?

"We ain't nothing but mammals"

Well, some of us cannibals

Who cut other people open like cantaloupes

But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes

Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope

But if you feel like I feel, I got the anecdote

Women wave your panty-hoes, sing the chorus and it goes



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