Modern Love

Hey, i'm feeling so dirty, you're looking so clean

All you can give is a spin in your washing machine

I fly off to rome to my prima bella

She leaves me in the rain with telescopic umbrella

Ooh the pain -- modern love can be a strain



I trusted my venus was untouched in her shell

But the pearls in her oyster were as tacky as hell

For lady godiva i came incognito

But her driver had stolen her red hot magneto

Ooh the pain -- modern love can be a strain



I don't know why they leave me in the lurch

To carry on the search

It's  driving me up the wall

Pity when i have so much passion

Romance is out of fashion

Can't handle modern love at all



So i worship diana by the light of the moon

When i pull out my pipe she screams out of tune

In paris my heart sinks when i see the mona lisa

She gives me the wink, then she shows me the freezer

Ooh the pain

Modern love can be a strain


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