100% of Nothing

I am he as you are he as you are me
And we are all together
See how they run like pigs from a gun
See how they fly
I'm crying

Sitting on a cornflake
Waiting for the van to come
Corporation T-shirt, stupid bloody Tuesday
Man you've been a naughty boy
You let your face grow long

I am the eggman
They are the eggmen
I am the walrus
Goo goo g' joob

Mr. City policeman sitting
Pretty little policemen in a row
See how they fly like Lucy in the sky
See how they run
I'm crying
I'm crying, I'm crying, I'm crying

Yellow matter custard
Dripping from a dead dog's eye
Crabalocker fishwife
Pornographic priestess
Boy, you've been a naughty girl
You let your knickers down

I am the eggman
They are the eggmen
I am the walrus
Goo goo g' joob

Sitting in an English garden
Waiting for the sun
If the sun don't come you get a tan
From standing in the English rain

I am the eggman
("How do you do sir")
They are the eggmen
("The man maintains a fortune")
I am the walrus
Goo goo g' joob Goo Goo Goo g' joob

Expert, texpert choking smokers
Don't you think the joker laughs at you
(Ho ho ho hee hee hee hah hah hah)
See how they smile like pigs in a sty
See how they snide
I'm crying

Semolina Pilchard
Climbing up the Eiffel tower
Elementary penguin singing Hare Krishna
Man, you should have seen them kicking
Edgar Allen Poe

I am the eggman
They are the eggmen
I am the walrus
Goo goo g' joob
Goo goo goo g' joob
Goo goo g' joob
Goo goo goo g' joob
Goo goo
Juba juba juba
Juba juba juba
Juba juba juba
Juba juba

(Oh I'm tired, servicible villain
Set you down father, rest you)