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Step back cause the bass is fuzzin'
Bloodhound Gang bangs more than the dirty dozen
Alley oop here comes the slam i know where I stand
I'm feelin' like Anthrax cause you know O'm the man
Yea I dug your dame but all I did was kiss her
But I got to second base with your mom and your sister
I'll wipe the grin off your face like I was a can of Windex
I threw a right I threw a right was I live or Memorex
Go down down deep deep in and out quick
Cause I'm harder than Chinese arithmetic
Now my fist is in your face cause you stood in my way
You tried to talk your shit and your ass got paid
I get stupid like the mongoloid Corky
Welcome to McDonald's may I take your order
Cause I'm cold kicken' lyrics like my arm was on fire
Like Pinnochio my nose don't grow cause I ain't no liar

Go down go down to get it up get it up
Go down go down to get it up y'all

Clap it on clap it off sniff my exhaust
Cause i got more steps than Barishnikov
Like a pirouette, a pirouette, a pair of wet jeans
You don't understand but your girl knows what I mean
So I kicks my lines kind of complex
A text of intricate words and other spoken effects
Like a preacher on the mount teaching things he doesn't follow
When you tried to hit the brake but pushed on the throttle
Mr. Goody Two Shoes picture the scenario
Your girl blew me as I blew your stereo
And I gots more bass than a baseball diamond
Don't put me on your chalkboard cause I'm not down with Simon
Sonic boom in your room assume you're not there
Booty licken' nugget picken' with your dad downstairs
Love is just a fallacy I got more force than gravity
I can run all night like an Energizer battery

Go down go down to get it up get it up
Go down go down to get it up y'all

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Coo coo ca choo baby you that's what you are
You are a hollywood star you're the high priestess by far
And you know this tune's for you we call it coo coo ca choo
And it's a very brief description of the things we could do to you

You were looking at me I was looking at you
Coo coo ca choo coo coo ca choo
You were looking at me I was looking at you
Coo coo ca choo now what ya gonna do

Oil me up quick miss daisy before I'm lubing up your tailpipe
Or the bedposts will be a knocking and a knocking 'til the break of light
Raised and dazed in a million and one ways
Like a Morton coffee roll I want you hot and glazed
So you're the real thing baby you're Parkay you're not butter
Gonna have to get you home and lube you up with fluff-n-nutter
Scope it scope it baby looking so fit
Playing games and laying dames you know I know you know it
Now you're quick to get the condom you know the Jimmy's gonna fit you snug
Lean you against the fire place and ride you on the bear skin rug
Chow down my Ding Dong come and sing along
Slip a grip around my tip and then you'll be my Klingon
Yeah in my sweat pants you're gonna see my erection
Ooh oh pick a de pop pop perfection
Umpla dumpla dippedee do
Cause I'd never leave the house if mommy looked like you

You were looking at me I was looking at you
Coo coo ca choo coo coo ca choo
You were looking at me I was looking at you
Coo coo ca choo now what ya gonna do

Butter up butter cup did ya think it'd really last long
My attention span hutches when you wake up know that I'll be gone
Cocoa butter beach blonde wearing that thin thong
You know I got a thing for you it's only an inch long
Now I'm picking up your signals like a TV station
I'm looking for the channel to have immoral applications
Looking so fine Cosmo behind
Fermentation of time like Reunite wine
Well I'm bubbling up and steaming like an active volcano
I think I clogged up all your pipes better get yourself some Draino
I get annoyed cause I can't avoid
Baby sounding like a mongoloid
I gots the skills to keep ya busy all night
If you do not bite I hope you blow like dynamite
Happy thanksgiving would you like a little white meat?
I'll stuff my Butterballs and you eat

You were looking at me I was looking at you
Coo coo ca choo coo coo ca choo
You were looking at me I was looking at you
Coo coo ca choo now what ya gonna do

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Ashes to ashes and funks to funky
Daddy Long Legs is a mean ass honky
And Jimmy Pop ain't no heiny hobbit gaybe
Ain't no big meaty chunks in my thick brown gravy
Cause I'm a Loch Ness a Loch Ness a Loch Ness monster
Jerry's Kids are knockin' at my door, "Could you be a sponsor?"
Tiny Bubbles in my tub pull my finger Lawrence Welk
If you wanna look like Rocky Dennis better drink your milk
When I'm feeling Oriental I gotta rub my chin
I'm gonna hold my water in like I'm Gunga Din
So have a taste of my bass cause the girlies got smiles
You get on my case like the Rockford Files
Crazy Eddie in the slammer cause he's giving it all away
John Boy in the barn with a horse in the hay
No rhyme no reason no job no class
And we don't go near the ghetto cause they'd shoot our ass

Go go yeah yeah huh what?
I'm a legend in my spare time

If you ain't ever been to the suburbs
Don't you ever come to the suburbs
Cause you wouldn't understand the suburbs
Cause I'm a huskin' a huskin' a huskin' your corn
I'm as deep as a plot to a gay porn
So Uh-Oh Spaghettios I forgot to hide away the body
I know that she's a hotty but damn that girl could party
So come to me momma it ain't no crime
I'm a skilled love doctor growlin', "What's your sign?"
Did the Flamin' Waffle with Ho Chi Min
Your girl's a dollar bill 'cause we don't know where she's been
J.F.K.'s head's a puzzle and your woman needs a muzzle
Barbara Eden in the bottle and now i'm gonna guzzle
You're too what? Shy shy huh what?
Hush hush yea? I knew why
Cause we're playing the Palladium can't get on Star Search
Daddy Legs standing tall he can do the Funky Lurch
And Jimmy Jimmy Pop is short for Jimmy Jimmy Popular
You know I know you know your not the tough guy that I thought you were

Go go yeah yeah huh what?
I'm a legend in my spare time

Cause I wopbobaloobop
Ha cha cha chatch
Come lick my balls
Vive la my crotch

Cause your daddy thinks I'm lazy your momma thinks I'm crazy
But neither of them know that you are carrying my baby
And I'm the Amos I'm the Andy I'm the sticky Aunt Jemammy
I gave you mouth to mouth like Resuscitation Annie
It takes two of us to do this like Dean Martin Jerry Lewis
And your throat is swollen gloryholen' ya blew us
George Burns' pacemaker beats steady slow and low
That's why we got more hits then a dealer at a Dead show

Go go yeah yeah huh what?
I'm a legend in my spare time

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Baby
Yeah
The first time I saw you darling I knew I was in love
Tell her Daddy
The way you took your wheelchair up that handicap ramp
Mmm, it's a mind blower
But now baby I miss ya I miss ya
I miss all the times we played Marco Polo in the pool
Oh yeah
Hide and go seek beneath the sheets
Oh yeah
And just the smell of the oil in your wheelchair
I remember the day I saw you hobbling
A Weeble Wobbling you had a problem
You didn't have any legs just a smile and some stumps
No smelly feet a torso to hump
No baby love yeah that's what we'd be making
Ride you like a Sit and Spin until your stumps started aching
Spin you around yeah roll you near yeah
Turn you upside down to hold my beer

You ain't got no legs but I love you just the same oh baby
You ain't got no legs but I love you just the same

They say nothing beats a great pair of legs but somehow
Baby the day you walked out of my life there's nothing
I wanted more than, than for you to come crawling back to me
When we started going together people said they couldn't believe it
That I could be so happy with a quadriplegic
We would wake up real early and you could make me some eggs mmm
Girl I didn't care if you ain't got no legs
I loved you for you and you loved me for me oh yeah
Wasn't really hard for those more fortunate to see
That the first time we made love it was such a wonderful feeling
The way the suspension wires held you 'cross the ceiling
When you rolled out of my life
My heart just broke
I can still hear the noise of the squeaks in your spokes

You ain't got no legs but I love you just the same oh baby
You ain't got no legs but I love you just the same

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Are those numchucks in your pants or are you just happy to see me?
Let me take you back to the day that I met my China girl
When I landed a 'Pam' like on the San Fran Real World
I was sweating like a vegetable inside of a wok
I'd never been to Asia Minor but I was gonna Bangkok
Like Kristy Yamaguchi I had to break the ice
Should I talk about Mothra M*A*S*H or shrimp-fried rice?
I was sharp as a Chinese star but it's a line I threw
Just thirty seconds over Tokyo and this Johnny would Woo
I took a shot like Jeanette Lee put on my moves like Bruce Lee
I told he every Soon Yi needs a little Woody
She said for all the tea in China my vagina's not free
But my love will linger longer than the Ming Dynasty
I said I needed her to do and her to do my laundry
I knew she needed a way to stay legally within the country
She was made in Taiwan I said I'm O.K. with that
Just promise me you'll never try to eat my cat
Chinky chinky bang bang I love you
Chinky chinky bang bang I know you love me too
In Japan the hand is used as a knife
In Japan a man's wife's hand job than can cost him his life
But now this Captain Kirk has his own Sulu
I'll shampoo her Foo Man Chu with Lo Hung Wang Goo
Cause I ride my slant-eyed slope like a brand new Kawasaki
Oh me chinky she's so kinky got me hot like Nagasaki
Burnin' up like Napalm burstin' like an A-bomb
I think I got that jungle fever but I caught it in 'Nam
She's like an oriental rug cause I lay her where I please
Then I blindfold her with dental floss and get down on her knees
I'm a diving Kamikaze eating out Chinese
First I'll have the poo-poo platter than some tuna sushi
She'll be screaming like Godzilla and kickin' like Jackie Chan
I'll get her redder than China wetter than the Sea of Japan
Like the Chinese New Year she's gonna see fireworks
Now be a good chinky and press Jimmy's shirts
Chinky chinky bang bang I love you
Chinky chinky bang bang I know you love me too
Sing chinky sing
One more time
Chinky chinky bang bang I love you
Chinky chinky bang bang I know you love me too
Chinky chinky bang bang chinky bang
Chinky chinky bang biddily biddily biddily bang

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Jimmy Pop's not a pooper not a pauper but a popper
And I got more pop than Orville Redenbacher
And I got more gravy than the whole Gravy Train
When I'm kooky going loopy like a man insane
I won't be around when the world ends
So the only thing that I'll recycle is your girlfriend
Aww back to the side I jump up I swing
When I'm using Knockem' Sockem' ya know I'm playing it to win
The Nina the Pinta the Santa Maria
See you later salamander cause I wouldn't want to be ya
I'm a chip I'm a Pringle cause you know I gots the flavor
Pop me up in your mouth like I was a Life Saver
Ain't got no soul but I got more than Don Henley
I'm whiter than Casper but I'm not that friendly
Marco Polo you tried to fly solo
Make your thoughts vocal I'll put ya in a choke hold

One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha
One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha I'll getcha

I'm a gangster no I'm a gangster bitch
Your momma gave me head your girlie gave me the itch
So scratch it 'til the bass beats fast listen to the shotgun blast
In the oven you'll get burned or in the tank that you'll get gassed
Fake-o like Bacos never mistake though
Showing up painted up fresh from Macco
Now I'm coming in in stereo rounder than a Cheerio
Quick to fill your fix and I'm dizzier than a merry-go
Rock this obnoxious I'm truly not nice
Cause I'm blood sucking evil like Muppets On Ice
Arriba arriba I'm the under achiever
Gonna Leave It To Beaver I'm the Daydream Believer
I'm like Mothra man with my big wingspan
And your the mother fucking Jap that killed my offspring Chan
I'm a Menace To Society I'm gonna fill the prophecy
First I'll drink your Genesee and then I'll take your liberty

One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha
One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha I'll getcha

Di Di Mao
You burn village down
You bring family over we all Wang Chung

I'm a tarantula in your Chiquita
And when you're peeling back the skin I'm gonna see ya
I'm gonna bite ya I'm gonna bite ya
I'm Jimmy Pop I'll tell you straight up I don't like ya
Cause I'm cold kicking lyrics till the day I die
Many fail to copy but at least they still try
Busting up vocabulary is what I do most
I'm gonna spread your legs like butter and gobble ya up like toast
You went for the cherry you went bobbing for the apple
But the apple it be rotten and you had to eat the scrappple
Scrapple? Pig meat from a pig pen hog leftovers your girlfriend
So I flex to the effects and I don't care what nobody thinks
I'm eating up your sherbert and dropping all your Tiddiley Winks
Whoops goes my arm I think it's outta socket
Come over little girlie I got some candy in my pocket

One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha
One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha I'll getcha

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One night me and the crew hit the road on a mission
To slurp free brew and go fuzzy flounder fishin'
Kayjees on the hi-fi and the keg was bottomless
Until we brought Skip O' Pot2mus
And Daddy's gonna get some probably underage and dumb
And everybody knows that the Daddy eats his young
Lupus in the lavatory making a big stink
Macing up the toilet seat and pooping in the sink
M.S.G.'s tanked up and wizzin' in a cup
Waiting for a sprinkle genie to come and drink it up
Cause I'm the one bottle willy with the 12 Horse Ale
After that I get silly like Soupy Sales
Now it's midnight and I'm completely boofy blitzed
A six of Shlitz and the Jew brew Manischewitz
With my beer-tinted glasses I'm ready to bitty battle
I'm Hungry Like The Wolf but I'll end up tending cattle

Cause you're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk)

Here she comes, a funky fried cutie
Mr. Jimmy Pop Ali is gonna get some booty
Cause I'm Mr. McFeelie with a speedy delivery
You'd think I was a ditch the way this chick was diggin' me
But maybe I should check and see if this is where I wanna be
Hey Lupus is she cute? Yea for a pygmie
Aw! What do you know? You're probably going home alone
And it wouldn't be the first time that I gave a dog a bone
Plus beauty, it's only skin deep
It's in the eye of the beholder and my beholder's about to tweak
I could tap that barrel, in fact I know I can
It's a msnags a trois you and me and Heineken

Cause you're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk)

Regrets I've had a few
First and foremost I'd like to mention you
For the sake of conversation we'll call you the Brand New Heavy
Your a mix between an Ugnaut and Eugene Levy
You can call it big-boned, I prefer to call it gut
You're Buddha you're Shamu you're Jabba the fuckin' Hutt
You had harpoon scars and your boobies were hairy
I smelt tuna melt but I wasn't gonna worry
It was 3 A.M. and I wasn't gettin' squat
So I rolled you up in flour and aimed it for the wet spot
I was buttering rolls like a soup kitchen Christian
Then it hit me something bit me while my little rod was fishin'
I was deep sea fishing I took a fat chance
But how was i supposed to know that Jabberjaws lived in your pants
At that junction I came to realize
That only Frank Purdue likes thighs that size
Fatty fatty boom ba latty I gotta lament
That you were not a girl you were an experiment

Cause you're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(You're pretty when I'm drunk)
You're pretty when I'm drunk
(and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk)

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