The Tv Album

Sometimes i feel
Like i need a vacation
Sometimes i feel
Like i wanna go
To the city of cavemen
The city of bedrock
I'd be a flinstone
Now i'll tell you why...

Well, i've got i've got a woman named wilma
Well, i've got i've got a baby named pebbles
Well, i've got i've got a doggy named dino
We do a little bowling and we drink a little vino

Well, i've got a little buddy, barney rubble
Got a neighbor by the name of barney rubble
He's a midget but he makes a lot of trouble
Doesn't like to shave, he got caveman stubble

Me and barney, loyal order water buffalo
Lodge brothers, loyal order water buffalo
There's a handshake everybody gotta know
How come grand poo-bah always gotta run the whole show?

Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
I get by on all my prehistoric knowhow

Betty and barney got a baby named bamm-bamm
Little pebbles is his number one fan
He's the strongest toddler in the whole land
Tear your arm off if he shakes your hand

Got a car, gonna push it with my feel now
Gonna take my family out to eat now
Jumbo ribs at the drive-in can't be beat now
Made from brontosaurus, baby, not a moo-cow

Wanna chill with a sabretooth tiger
Wear a loincloth, natural fiber
Be the first rolling stone subscriber
Got a pterodactyl for a windshield wiper

Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Don't know what it means but i say it anyhow

Luck me, workin' down in the gravel put
Movin' rocks, on a big dinosaur i sit
Mr. slate gets mad and he throws a fit
Pull the birdie's tail, everybody knows it's time to quit

I realize i'm living in the stone age
No fax, no cellular phone-age
Pick my teeth with a dinosaur bone-age
Liftin' heavy boulders every day for my wage

Barney rubble, laughin' like a hyena
Barney rubble, what a little weiner
Where's wilma? anybody seen her?
Got a baby elephant vacuum cleaner

Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now

R: hey lucy, i'm home

L: oh ricky, you're so fine
L: you're so fine you blow my mind
L: hey ricky, hey ricky

R: oh lucy, you're so fine
R: you're so fine you blow my mind
R: hey lucy, hey lucy

L: oh ricky, you're so fine
L: you play your bongos all the time
L: hey ricky, hey ricky

R: oh lucy, you're so fine
R: how i love tyo hear you whine
R: hey lucy

L: hey ricky
L: you always play your conga drums, you think you got the right
L: you wake up little ricky in the middle of the night
L: stop shakin' your maraccas now and just turn out the light ricky

R: i'm sick of fred and ethel always comin' over here
R: 'cause fred eats all our pretzel sticks and then he spills his beer
R: why don't you serve your cassarole and make them disappear lucy

L: oh ricky, what's a girl like me supposed to do
L: you really drive me wild when you sing your babaloo
R: oh lucy, you're so dizzy, don't you have a clue
R: well, here's to you lucy
R: i love you too lucy, too lucy, let's babaloo lucy

L: hey ricky
L: you're always playin' at the club, you never let me go
L: i'm beggin' and i'm pleadin' but you always tell me no
L: oh, please honey please, let me be in your show ricky, wah

R: you always burn the roast and you drop the dishes too
R: you iron my new shirt and you burn a hole right through
R: you're such a crazy redhead i just don't know what to do lucy

L: oh ricky
L: what a pity, don't you understand
L: that every day's a rerun and the laughter's always canned
R: oh lucy
R: i'm the latin leader of the band
R: so here's to you lucy
R: let's babaloo lucy, too lucy
R: everybody rumba!

R: ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Put down your remote control
Throw out your tv guide
Put away your jacket
There's no need to go outside
Don't you know that we control the horizontal
We control the verticle, too
We gonna make a couch potato out of you
That's what we gonna do now

Don't change the channel
Don't touch that dial
We got it all on uhf
Kick off your sneakers
Stick around for a while
We got it all on uhf
Don't worry 'bout your laundry
Forget about your job
Just crank up the volume
And yank off the knob
We got it all, we got it all, we got it all on uhf

Disconnect the phone and leave the dishes in the sink
You better put away your homework
Prime time ain't no time to think
All you do is make yourself a tv dinner
Press your face right up against the screen
We gonna show you thangs you ain't ever seen
If you know what i mean, now

Don't change the channel
Don't touch that dial
We got it all on uhf
Kick off your sneakers
Stick around for a while
We got it all on uhf
Don't worry 'bout your laundry
Forget about your job
Just crank up the volume
And yank off the knob
We got it all, we got it all, we got it all on uhf

You can watch us all day
You can watch us all night
You can watch us any time that you please
You can sit around and stare at the picture tube
'till your brain turns into cottage cheese
Well, now

Don't change the channel
Don't touch that dial
We got it all on uhf
Kick off your sneakers
Stick around for a while
We got it all on uhf
Don't worry 'bout your laundry
Forget about your job
Just crank up the volume
And yank off the knob
We got it all, we got it all, we got it all on uhf
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (we got it all)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (we got it all)
We got it all (we got it all) on uhf (we got it)
(we got it) we got (we got it) it all (we got it) on uhf (we got it all)
We got it all on uhf (we got it all)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all (we got it all) on uhf (on uhf)
We got it all on uhf
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all (we got it all) on uhf (we go it)
We got it all on uhf
We got it all on uhf
We got it all on uhf
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf (uhf)
We got it all on uhf

Oh-oh-oh-oh

I was there to match my intellect on national tv
Against a plumber, oh, and an architect, both with a phd
I was tense, i was nervous, i guess it just wasn't my night
Art fleming gave the answers
Oh, but i couldn't get the questions right, -ight, -ight

I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)
I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)

Well, i knew i was in trouble now
My hope of winning sank
Oh, 'cause i got the daily double now
And then my mind went blank
I took potpourri for one hundred
And then my head started to spin
Well, i'm givin' up don pardo
Just tell me now what i didn't win, yeah, yeah

I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)
I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)

That's right, al--you lost. and let me tell you what you didn't win: a twenty colume set of the encyclopedia international, a case of turtle wax, and a yeard's supply of rice-a-roni, the san fra
O treat. but that's not all. you also made yourself look like a jerk in front of millions of people. you brought shame and disgrace to your family name for generations to come. you don't get to
Back tomorrow. you don't even get a lousy copy of our home game. you're a complete loser!

Don't know what i was thinkin' of
I guess i just wasn't too bright
Well, i sure hope i do better
Next weekend on the price is right, -ight, -ight

I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)
I lost on jeopardy, baby (oooh)
I lost on jeopardy, baby

here's johnny

There he goes, he drives me crazy
When he says...(hee-eere's johnny!)
That's his job, it's so amazing
All he says is...(hee-eere's johnny!)
I never miss a moment when he's on the tube
His being there has made my life worth living
The chills run down my spine
Each time he says that line

"here's johnny!" he says, and laughs in his special way
"...johnny!" he says, you know i love him
"here's johnny!" he says, and "second fiddle" is his game
Ed mcmahon's his name...all right

Dressed so fine, he's such a cool dude
Hear him say...(hee-eere's johnny!)
Watch him selling beer and dog food
Hear him say...(hee-eere's johnny!)
I got a letter from him just the other day
He said, "you may already be a winner!"
A trooper to the end
A clydesdale's best friend

"here's johnny!" he says, and laughs in his special way
"...johnny!" he says, you know i love him
"here's johnny!" he says, and that's the way he gets his pay
What a living

Oh...(here's johnny! here's johnny!) wo-o-o, no
(here's johnny! here's johnny!) no no no no no no, i don't believe it
(here's johnny!) he says, and everytime it's just the same
Ed mcmahon's his name

A very special guy...all right
He's on every night
Can't change the channel
When he's sitting on the panel
(hee-eere's johnny!)
There he goes, he gives me goose bumps
When he says...(hey-o-hey-hey-o!)

"here's johnny!" he says, and laughs in his special way
"...johnny!" he says, you know i love him
"here's johnny!" he says, that seems to be his claim to fame
Ed mcmahon's his name

Beverly

Beverly hillbillies

Huh, now lookie here people
Listen to my story
A little story 'bout a man named jed
You know something?
That poor mountaineer
They say he barely kept his family fed

Now, let me tell you
One day he was shootin'
Old jed was shootin' at some food
When all of a sudden right up from the ground, there
Well, there came a bubblin' crude

Oil that is well, maybe you call it black gold or texas tea
He gonna move next to mr. drysdale and be a beverly hillbilly...

Before you know it, all the kinfolk are-a-sayin'
Yeah, buddie, move away from there
That little clampet got his own cement pond
That little clampet, he's a millionaire

Now, everyone said californie
Is the place that you oughta be
We got to load up this here truck now
We got to move to beverly
Hills, that is

Swimming pools
Move-a-move-a-movie stars
Huh
Lookit that, lookit that

Beverly beverly beverly hillbillies
Y'all come back now, y'hear?
Beverly beverly beverly hillbillies
Beverly beverly beverly hillbillies
Beverly beverly beverly hillbillies