Cheap Beer Night

I pulled into memphis, i could not slow down
My brakes were gone, i wrecked the car...fire on the ground
Then my car exploded and the flames licked my chin
And my life flashed before my eyes like an x-rated film
Like a poison arrow my soul shot through the sky
Landed there at heaven's gate, much to my surprise
And an angel with a halo walked up and said, "hey, dude!
Welcome to heaven...we've got this glass of milk for you."
(chorus)
I said, "hey st. peter, won't you open up your gate...
I hear the devil calling, now please don't make me late.
He's got loud guitars, alcohol, cheap jamaican whores...
I don't want to stay in heaven no more."

Well, satan came a-running, said, "hey, that boy is mine!"
He had a john hiatt t-shirt and trouble in his eye
Then the devil on cloud 7 and st. peter on cloud 4
Played a hand of poker, and the winner gets my soul

Chorus

Well the last thing i remember, satan held two jacks
And i woke up in the back of a memphis ambulance
And i do not know for certain which cards st. peter held
So i'm breaking all ten commandments to make sure i go to hell

Chorus

You and me - let's join the enemy
Fly to paris, plan a bank robbery
I've got the tickets, let's pick up some cigarettes
Grab your jacket, the wind is blowing cold
I've got this contact, he's ready for action
We've got to cut while the knife is still sharp
Crime does not pay, but this time it's different
One week in france and count your money in the dark
(chorus)
Don't try to tell me you never dreamed about it
Don't try to tell me you never wondered how it felt
The world is full of dreamers... it's the secret of television
I don't want your television i want real bullets

Just our luck -- we were born in suburbia
Raised on sunshine and white bread sin
I think it's time we got some dirt under our fingernails
I think it's time we got some blood under our skin
I got this cancer burning inside of me
9 to 5, income tax, taking their toll
Get you some heroin, get me a prostitute
We'll sleep much easier with evil in our souls

Chorus

What if we die? that'd be a pity
It's been years since i saw you this young
Maybe we'll take our share, run to venezuela
Buy a fleet of jaguars, race 'em in the sun

Chorus

Well you were having your fun
Just lying in the sun
Now you can stand like a man
But if you're smart enough you're gonna turn and run
I can feel it in my heart
They're gonna feed you to the sharks
Well it's hard to believe
You're not the only mouth to feed
And your sense of adventure's gonna fade
When you see yourself bleed
I can feel it in my heart
They're gonna feed you to the sharks

Well take a deep breath
While you still have one left
Cause you'll be walking on water
In the valley of the shadow of death
And i can feel it in my heart
They're gonna feed you to the sharks

Well you were having your fun
Just lying in the sun
Now you can stand like a man
But if you're smart enough you're gonna turn and run
I can feel it in my heart
They're gonna feed you to the sharks

So what did you do?
It was a little bit less than you should have done
When the cards were laid on the table
And how did you love?
With a little bit less heart that you should have had
But we all do the best that we're able
(chorus)
I haven't got a clue (he hasn't got a clue)
Which is the right direction
So i'll leave it up to you (he'll leave it up to you)
Failing with the best intentions

So what did you see?
It was a little bit less than you should have been
But you're not alone in being blind
And what did you say?
It was a little bit less than you should have said
But the right words are so hard to come by

Chorus

I'm falling down (falling down)
But i'm all right (i'm all right)
These simple things (simple things)
Complicate my life... (ooooooh)

So how did you live?
With a little bit less life than you should have had
But your own rules are so hard to follow
And what do you know?
Just a little bit less than you could have known
But the truth is so hard to swallow

Chorus

I'm falling down (falling down)
But i'm all right (i'm all right)
These simple things (simple things)
Complicate my life... (ooooooh)

So this is not your golden year
When you add up the blues and the greys
And you're standing face to face with your fears
Feeling your head against the wall
So maybe you're not the golden child
Just this once, your luck is not enough
Oh, and no one that you ask can tell you why
You're feeling your head against the wall

Your brow is wet with blood and sweat
Hoping that someday you'll see the sunshine streaming through
Oh, and i wish i could tell you that this was the worst it could get
Feeling your head against the wall

No no no no no no no no no no
It goes on and on and on into the endless night
It will be over soon
Through it goes on and on and on into the endless night
It will be over soon
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
On and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on...

Hey there, what do you know?
I'm still thinking about you
It's funny how we see ourselves
We never notice what we do
Til the cup is broke, til the moment's gone
Til the dawn is day, and the day is done
Remember the words we used...
Do you think they might be true?
Forget it. let 'em slip away
We'll never know how much we knew
Til the cup is broke, til the moment's gone
Til the dawn is day, and the day is done

And do you remember
The leaps of faith it took us to get back to here
And i just can't imagine
The tricks of fate we stumbled on when it was all so clear

This letter, i kissed it once
Wishing that you could kiss me
It's silly, a romantic hope
But it's all i can see
Til i touch your mouth, til i touch your hand
Til i feel the skin of your hips under me

Til the cup is broke, til the moment's gone
Til the dawn is day, and the day is done
Til i touch your mouth, til i touch your hand
Til i feel the skin of your hips under me
Under me... under me...
Til i feel the skin of your hips under me

The newspapers wrote him up, now his name's on everybody's lips
Mrs. culpepper's dog's a big band enthusiast
He's a pedigree with a minor key
He's a canine with a c sharp nine
Sammy the dog has learned to play trombone
He starts blowing at midnight, wakes up the whole neighborhood
He's worse than a cat fight, but no one minds 'cause he sounds so good
He won't fetch a stick or lick your hand
He loves spike jones and dixieland
Sammy the dog has learned to play trombone

Call the national enquirer... they'll pay cash for an interview
Call up johnny carson... oprah winfrey just won't do

In l.a. and london, the critics are all falling down
The next great pop superstar's a two foot tall basset hound
He's a drop out from pet school
Now he's top dog where the cats are cool
Sammy the dog has learned to play trombone

He's got a wirehair terrier meets him at the backstage door
He loves champagne and heroin...it's not a dog's life anymore
He's on the cover of rolling stone
He's got movie offers on the phone
Sammy the dog has learned to play trombone