Singles -

i met her in a poolroom
Her name i didn't catch
She looked like something special
The kind who'd understand
The room was almost spinning
She pulled another smile
She had the grace like pleasure
She had a certain style

Sunlight on the lino
Woke me with a shake
I looked around to find her but she'd gone
Goodbye girl
Goodbye girl
Goodbye girl

She took me to her motel
The room on the second floor
A kettle and two coffees
Her number on the door
She said i hardly know you
Agreed we kissed goodnight
I knew that in the morning
Somehow i'd wake to find

Sunlight on the lino
Woke me with a shake
I looked around to find her but she'd gone
Goodbye girl
Goodbye girl
Goodbye girl

I lost my silver bracelet
My clubroom locker keys
The money in the billfold
It doesn't bother me
My wife has moved to boston
So luck is not the word
If you ever see her
Say hello goodbye girl

Sunlight on the lino
Woke me with a shake
I looked around to find her but she'd gone
Goodbye girl
Goodbye girl
Goodbye girl
Goodbye girl
Goodbye girl
Goodbye girl
Goodbye girl

(difford/tilbrook)

They do it down on camber sands
They do it at waikiki
Lazing about the beach all day,
At night the crickets creepy
Squinting faces at the sky
A harold robbins paperback
Surfers drop their boards and dry
And everybody wants a hat
But behind the chalet
My holiday's complete
And i feel like william tell
Maid marian on her tiptoed feet
Pulling mussels from a shell

Shrinking in the sea so cold
Topless ladies look away
A he-man in a sudden shower
Shelters from the rain
You wish you had a motor boat
To pose around the harbour bar
And when the sun goes off to bed
You hook it up behind the car

Two fat ladies window shop
Something for the mantelpiece
In for bingo all the nines
A panda for sweet little niece
The coach drivers stand about
Looking at a local map
About the boy he's gone away
Down to next door's caravan

(difford/tilbrook)

The indians send signals
From the rocks above the pass
The cowboys take positions
In the bushes and the grass
The squaw is with the corporal
She is tied against the tree
She doesn't mind the language
It's the beating she don't need
She lets loose all the horses
When the corporal is asleep
And he wakes to find the fire's dead
And arrows in his hats
And davy crockett rides around
And says it's cool for cats
The sweeney's doing ninety
'cos they've got the word to go
They get a gang of villains
In a shed up at heathrow
They're counting out the fivers
When the handcuffs lock again
In and out of wandsworth
With the numbers on their names
It's funny how their missus'
Always look the bleeding same
And meanwhile at the station
There's a couple of likely lads
Who swear like how's your father
And they're very cool for cats
They're cool for cats

To change the mood a little
I've been posing down the pub
On seeing my reflection
I'm looking slightly rough
I fancy this, i fancy that
I wanna be so flash
I give a little muscle
And i spend a little cash
But all i get is bitter and a nasty little rash
And by the time i'm sober
I've forgotten what i've had
And ev'rybody tells me that it's cool to be a cat
Cool for cats

Shake up at the disco
And i think i've got a pull
I ask her lots of questions
And she hangs on to the wall
I kiss her for the first time
And then i take her home
I'm invited in for coffee
And i give the dog a bone
She likes to go to discos
But she's never on her own
I said i'll see you later
And i give her some old chat
But it's not like that on the tv
When it's cool for cats
It's cool for cats

(difford/tilbrook)

The case was pulled from under the bed
She made a call to a sympathetic friend
And made arrangements
The door was closed there was a note
I couldn't be bothered
Maybe i'll choke
No more engagements

With where have you been's
And faraway frowns
Trying to be good
By not being 'round
And here in the bar
The piano man's found
Another nail for my heart

That stupid old bug
That kills only love
I want to be good
Is that not enough

So play me the song
That makes it so tough
Another nail for my heart
Then play me that song
That makes it so tough
Another nail for my heart

I had excuses those little boy lies
That she computed by watching my eyes
And told me firmly

She couldn't stand it i'm bad on her heart
She dropped her makeup and i found the bar
Now it concerns me

I've had a bad time
Now love is resigned
I've been such a fool
I've loved and goodbyed

So here in the bar
The piano man's found
Another nail for my heart
And here in the bar
The piano man's found
Another nail for my heart

(difford/tilbrook)

She was frigid like a bible
When she met her boyfriend michael
He took her in his zephyr
They sat like salt and pepper
Looking out across the city
From lover's leap is pretty
The lights they flick and flutter
He told her how he loved her
Next night he called for her
But dad protected daughter
And told him she was poorly
A lie was told there surely
So michael felt rejected
This wasn't quite expected
He drove off to his local
Where he felt anti-social

She cried all night at missing
The boy she could be kissing
While he was falling over
He drunk himself back sober
And went home in a taxi
And crashed out in the back seat
He slept just like a baby
Which he hadn't done just lately
He saw her in the morning
Out with his sister pauline
She felt all shy and soppy
He acted cool and cocky
He said tonight at charlie's
There's going to be a party
I'll meet you at half seven
She visualised the heaven

If you ever change your mind
Which you do from time to time
Never chew a pickle
With a little slap and tickle
You have to throw the stone
To get the pool to ripple

That night they danced together
It looked like love forever
He put his hand on her leg
You should have heard what she said
He tried again much later
It seemed to aggravate her
He drove home in silence
Avoiding all violence
She said let's watch the city
From lover's leap is pretty
I think i need the fresh air
She put a comb through her hair
Then while she turned to kiss him
And very nearly missed him
She put her hand on his leg
He felt her tongue in his head

If you ever change your mind
Which you do from time to time
Never chew a pickle
With a little slap and tickle
You have to throw the stone
To get the pool to ripple

(difford/tilbrook)

She goes for her medical
She's passed, it's a miracle
She's up over the moon
She whistles nonsense tunes
She wants drinks for everyone
She's found a chord that she can strum
Emotions leaking out
Her paint's all over town
What's that she's playing?
(annie get your gun)
What's that she's taking?
(the song has to be sung)
She's gone electric
(annie wipe them out)
That's unexpected
(strum that thing and shout)
Don't pull that trigger
(annie get your gun)
Don't shoot that singer
(you're shooting number one)

He's not into miracles
Sees life all too cynical
The cat has got his tongue
Now she bangs on his drum
He says pull the other one
Bells ring, look what you have done
Emotions leaking out
Her paint's all over town

(difford/tilbrook)

She unscrews the top of a new whiskey bottle
And shuffles about in her candle lit hovel,
Like some kind of witch with blue fingers in mittens
She smells like the cat and the neighbours she sickens,
The black and white t.v. has long seen a picture
The cross on the wall is a permanent fixture,
The postman delivers the final reminders
She sells off her silver and poodles in china.
Drinks to remember, i me and myself
And winds up the clock
And knocks dust from the shelf
Home is a love that i miss very much
So the past has been bottled and labelled with love.

During the war time an american pilot
Made every air raid a time of excitement,
She moved to his prairie and married the texan
She learnt from a distance how love was a lesson,
He became drinker and she became mother
She knew that one day she'd be one or the other,
He ate himself older, drunk himself dizzy
Proud of her features, she kept herself pretty.

He like a cowboy died drunk in his slumber
Out on the porch in the middle of summer,
She crossed the ocean back home to her family
But they had retired to roads that were sandy,
She moved home alone without friends or relations
Lived in a world full of age reservation,
On moth eaten armchairs she'd say that she'd sod all
The friends who had left her to drink from the bottle.