Two Lefts

we all know the girls that i am talking about
well they are time bombs and they are ticking
and the only question's when they'll blow up
and they'll blow up; we know that without a doubt
cause they're those girls, yeah you know those girls that let their emotions get the best of them

and i've contrived some sort of a plan to help my fellow man
let's get emotional girls to all wear mood rings
so we'll be tipped off to when they're ticked off
cause we'll know just what they're thinking
cause what they're thinking...

she's so pretty but she but doesn't always act that way
her mood's out swinging on the swing set almost every day
she said to me that she's so happy it's depressing
and all i said was "someone get that girl a mood ring"

if it's drama you want then look no further
they're like the real world meets boy meets world meets days of our lives
and it just kills me how they get away with murder
they'll anger you then bat their eyes; those pretty eyes that watch you sympathize

and i've contrived some sort of a plan to help my fellow man
let's get emotional girls to all wear mood rings
so we'll be tipped off to when they're ticked off
cause we'll know just what they're thinking
cause what they're thinking...

she's so pretty but she but doesn't always act that way
her mood's out swinging on the swing set almost every day
she said to me that she's so stressed out that it's soothing
and all i said was "someone get that girl a mood ring"

cause when it's black (it) means watch your back because you're probably
the last person in the world right now she wants to see
and when it's blue it means that you should call her up immediately
and ask her out because she'll most likely agree
and when it's green it simply means that she is really stressed
and when it's clear it means she's completely emotionless (and that's all right i must confess)

we all know the girls that i am talking about
she liked you wednesday but now it's friday and she has to wash her hair
and it just figures that we'll never figure them out
first she's jekyll and then she's hyde....at least she makes a lovely pair

mood ring oh mood ring
oh tell me will you bring
the key to unlock this mystery
of girls and their emotions
play it back in slow motion
so i may understand the complex infrastructure known as the female mind

[speaking:]
heh...that's terrible

[liner note:]
it's a typical cloudy day in canton, ohio, and the relient k boys are trying to score something to do.
matt t. gives dave's cell a phone call.

[*cell phone ring*]
what's up dude?
i'm getting kind of bored
let's get some food
and then hit movies 4
what's going on?
whats up with all our friends?
let's start a rumor
just to find out where it ends

cause a small town is like a small stage
for teenagers and their drama
instead of playing shows, we'll be showing plays
like 90210 without the beverly hills

well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we never settle down (never settle down)
well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we get out of this town (get out of this town)
cause if we leave then we just might be okay

hoopes i did it again
i messed everything up, and i think i hurt my friends
hoopes i did it again
relationships that work are things that i can't comprehend

ohio has the flavor of a water chestnut
it's not too crazy and it's not the best but
we're not setting forest fires just out of boredom
i'd rather see a movie if in fact i can afford one

cause a small town is like a small stage
for teenagers and their drama
instead of playing shows, we'll be showing plays
like 90210 without the beverly hills

well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we never settle down (never settle down)
well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we get out of this town (get out of this town)

cause if we leave then we just might make a difference
and if we leave then we just might be okay
and i don't think it would hurt to get away

hoopes i did it again
i messed everything up, and i think i hurt my friends
hoopes i did it again
relationships that work are things that i can't comprehend

dan bakitus said i'm shallow
he said i've got no integrity
but, i don't know dan bakitus
and dan bakitus, he don't know me

cause we always say in canton
you can't enjoy (canton joy) yourself
well, there's truth to that
but may i add
it's not half bad
and never less than that

cause we always say in canton
you can't enjoy (canton joy) yourself
well, there's truth to that
but may i add
it's not half bad
and never less than that

sometimes it's embarrassing to talk to you
to hold a conversation with the only one who sees right through
this version of myself
i try to hide behind
i'll bury my face because my disgrace will leave me terrified

and sometimes i'm so thankful for your loyalty
your love regardless of the mistakes i make will spoil me
my confidence is, in a sense, a gift you've given me
and i'm satisfied to realize you're all i'll ever need

you looked into my life
and never stopped
and you're thinking all my thoughts
are so simple but so beautiful
and you recite my words right back to me
before i even speak
you let me know, i am understood

and sometimes i spend my time
just trying to escape
i work so hard, so desperately, in an attempt to create space
cause i want distance from the utmost important thing i know
i see your love, then turn my back, and beg for you to go

you looked into my life
and never stopped
and you're thinking all my thoughts
are so simple but so beautiful
and you recite my words right back to me
before i even speak
you let me know, i am understood

you're the only one who understands
completely
you're the only one who knows me yet still loves completely

and sometimes the place i'm at is at a loss for words
if i think of something worthy, i know that it's already yours
and through the times i've faded and you've outlined me again
you've just patiently waited, to bring me back and then

you looked into my life
and never stopped
and you're thinking all my thoughts
are so simple but so beautiful
and you recite my words right back to me
before i even speak
you let me know, i am understood

the noise has broken my defense
let me embrace salvaction
your voice has broken my defense
let me embrace salvation

the noise has broken my defense
let me embrace salvaction
your voice has broken my defense
let me embrace salvation

the noise has broken my defense
let me embrace salvaction
your voice has broken my defense
let me embrace salvation

your voice has broken my defense
let me embrace salvation
let me embrace
let me embrace salvation

so it was jeremy in 1983
in his ocean pacific t
who got a bloody knee
on his skateboard
in the half pipe
in the backyard
that tuesday night

and i'm only gonna pierce my left ear
and i've been working on this mustache all summer long
and my favorite band will always be tears for fears
and i'm gonna wear a pink tux to the prom

cutting class through the first floor window
he's driving fast cause he never did a thing slow
and i look up to my big bro
cause in the 80's all the ladies grabbed his hand and couldn't let go

and i'm only gonna pierce my left ear
and i've been working on this mustache all summer long
and my favorite band will always be tears for fears
and i'm gonna wear a pink tux to the prom (a pink tux to the prom)

doo doo, a doo doo doo
pink tux to the prom
doo doo, a doo doo doo
pink tux to the prom

i am gonna wear a pink tux to the prom
live without a care...what could possibly go wrong?

when you're president of the breakfast club
and you're not hesitant to fall in love (to fall in love)
to throw it away to fall in love with the 80's

i am gonna wear a pink tux to the prom
live without a care...what could possibly go wrong?
i am gonna wear a pink tux to the prom
live without a care...
cause you threw it away to fall in love with the 80's

doo doo, a doo doo
doo doo, a doo doo
doo doo, a doo doo

arg wu sentafinticate nar dunderford
bida menti kosticated interserd
thorphilliate stinded yilla billa zay
wentora yate paravillintiniay
paravillintiniay

dorga orpha dorga billa
dorga orpha stifaleare
dorga orpha dorga billa
tonalation fonamere

stop talking gibberish
or just stop talking
stop talking gibberish
or just stop talking
stop talking gibberish
or just stop talking
stop talking gibberish
or just stop talking now

if i had one wish
well i don't know what i'd wish for
but if i had a million zillion wishes
i'd use one to let you know that gibberish is
not a nice way to talk to all your

mork sawx ippen reeby yufftabar
higgerd quillip ernigrade du wellinshar
lirp crawn xyfa gourk jawinstabray
venaldo urp paravillintiniay
paravillintiniay

stop talking gibberish
or just stop talking
stop talking gibberish
or just stop talking
stop talking gibberish
or just stop talking
stop talking gibberish
or just stop talking now

if i had one wish
well i don't know what i'd wish for
but if i had a million zillion wishes
i'd use one to let you know that gibberish is
not a nice way to talk to all your friends

someone please save us, us college kids!
what my parents told me is what i did
they said go to school and be a college kid
but in the end i question why i did

i'm poor, i'm starving, i'm flat broke, i've got no cash to spend
sell all my books for front row tickets to dave matthews band
my girlfriend's at another school, i know this year will test her
i called, found out she had three other boyfriends last semester

and that's why i say
oh no! not for me, not for me
call it torture, call it university
no! arts and crafts is all i need
i'll take calligraphy and then i'll make a fake degree

80 grand later i found out that all that i had learned
is that you should show up to take your finals and your midterms
the party scene is kinda mean, i think it's sick and twisted
the navy showed up at my dorm and claimed that i enlisted

and that's why i say
oh no! not for me, not for me
call it torture, call it university
no! arts and crafts is all i need
i'll take calligraphy and then i'll make a fake degree

don't get excited. she'll say "no" without a doubt you see
and i've decided college girls just won't go out with me
they make me nervous and they always catch me off my guard
like cell phone services i drop out cause college is too hard

it's time to call my father
cause it's his alma mater
good grades aren't what they seem
i think he knows the dean
it's time to call my father
cause it's his alma mater
he says he's proud of me
but college always was his dream
and i would always say it's not for me

oh no! not for me, not for me
call it torture, call it university
no! arts and crafts is all i need
i'll take calligraphy and then i'll make a fake degree

someone please save us, us college kids!
what my parents told me is what i did
they said go to school and be a college kid
but in the end i question why i did

do what will make you happy
do what you feel is right
only but one thing matters
learn how to live your life

[in background:]
(phi, beta, delta, cappa
someone please save us, us college kids!
what my parents told me is what i did
they said go to school and be a college kid
but in the end i question why i did)

do what will make God happy
do what you feel is right
only but one thing matters
learn how to live your life

ok, so, who doesn't own a cell phone
who brought back their permission slip
because i know nobody wants to stay home
while the rest of us go out and make a day of it

cause theme parks are so much more fun when the sun's outside
and i lost my phone to the lake beneath the batman ride

they're starting something, and i don't want to begin it
they're looking for trouble, but with me it won't be found
and i regret that i'm completely out of daytime minutes
and so i guess i'll have to wait a lot till 8 o'clock comes around

ok, so, who doesn't own a cell phone
well i don't need to ask my friends
because i know mine was fastened to my jawbone
thanks to all those nights and weekends

cause theme parks are so much more fun when the sun's outside
and i lost my phone to the lake beneath the batman ride

they're starting something, and i don't want to begin it
they're looking for trouble, but with me it won't be found
and i regret that i'm completely out of daytime minutes
and so i guess i'll have to wait a lot till 8 o'clock comes around

when it comes to relationships i'm the dumbest one
and i don't mean just with girls, i mean with everyone
your illustrations always point out just what's wrong with me
it's chapstick, and chapped lips, and things like chemistry

it's chapstick, and chapped lips, and things like
it's chapstick, and chapped lips, and things like
it's chapstick, and chapped lips, and things like chemistry

can i relate to you the way you relate to me
can you help me out with my chemistry
i don't want to be precieved the way i am
i just want to be percieved the way i am