So Long, Astoria

these hospital walls are the palest of white
here in this desert they're reciting my last rites
the smell of these halls
brings temporary comfort
as the oxygen flows through my blood
el corazon was poisoned tonight...
she's on her eight of nine.

when half of all your prayers are insincere,
the other half are lies.
here is this watermark under this bridge.
the point where it all crested,
rolled back and drifted into the sea.
i climb from this wreckage
as the smoke begins to clear from my lungs.
the closest of close calls has happened tonight.

it's time that i made things right
for the first time,
since the last time.
let this moment of clarity
lift this curse that has been cast upon me.

appreciate the good times,
but don't take the worst for granted.
'cause you only get so many second chances

Lighting fireworks in parking lots,
The black top's singing me to sleep.
Hanging out at truck stops just to pass the time.
and wreaking havoc on our world.
Breaking into hotel swimming pools,

and eventually you'll finally get it right.
is just following your heart
The only thing that matters
These are the best days of our lives.
Being grown up isn't half as fun as growing up:

I guess when it comes down to it...
It still brings a smile to my face.
quoting lines from all those movies that we loved.
and listening to 80's songs;
All the nights we stayed up talking
I'm knowing that right now is all that matters.
and not a spoken feeling.
There were choruses and sing-alongs,
It was the best I ever had.
I write you visions of my summer.
Here in this diary,
illuminate the blackest nights.
Cherry cokes under this moonlit summer sky.
2015 Riverside, it's time to say, "goodbye."
Get on the bus, it's time to go.

Being grown up isn't half as fun as growing up:
These are the best days of our lives.
The only thing that matters
is just following your heart,
and eventually you'll finally get it right.

got your letter and the poetry you sent me
postmarked in december of last year
i really hope you're doing better
all your friends close by your side
one step closer to recovery

i wish there was something i could say
to erase each and every page
you've been through
even though its not my place to save you

i appreciate but cant accept this thank you note
thats sealed with your last breath
and i won't stand aside
and listen to you give up

if you'll just hold on for one more second
just hold on to what you have
just hold on/ just hold on
if you'll just hold on for one more second
just hold on to what you have
just hold on/ just hold on

these arms remain stretched out to you
maybe someday you'll accept them
maybe its too late to save a young girls heart that slowly stopped beating
(maybe)

wake up wake up you've gotta believe
wake up wake up
you cant give up time keeps going on without us
long after we're dead and gone

i wish there was something i could say
to erase each and every page
you've been through
even though its not my place to save you

i appreciate but cant accept this thank you note
thats sealed with your last breath
and i won't stand aside
and listen to you give up
if you'll just hold on for one more second

just hold on to what you have
just hold on/ just hold on
if you'll just hold on for one more second
just hold on to what you have
just hold on/ just hold on

It was the first snow of the season
i can almost see you breathin
in the middle of that empty street

Sometimes i still see myself
in that lonesome bedroom
playin my guitar
and singing songs of hope
for a better future

life is....only....
as good as the memories we make
and i'm taking back what belongs to me

polaroids of classrooms unattended
these relics of remembrence
are just like shipwrecks
only theyre gone faster
than the smell after it rains

last night while everyone was sleepin
i tripped through my old neighborhood
and resurrected memories from ashes

we said that we would never fit in
but we were really just like them
does rebellion ever make a difference

life is
only
as good as the memories we make
and im taking back what belongs to me
polaroids of classrooms unattended
these relics of remembrence
are just like shipwrecks
only theyre gone faster
than the smell after it rains

So long astoria
i found a map to buried treasure
and even if we come home empty handed
well still have our stories
of battle scars, pirate ships and wounded hearts,
broken bones, and all the best of friendships

and when this hourglass
has filtered out
its final grain of sand
i raise my glass to the memories we had
this is my wish
this is my wish
im takin back
im takin them all back

Nobody on the road
Nobody on the beach
I feel it in the air
The summer's out of reach
Empty lake, empty streets
The sun goes down alone
I'm drivin' by your house
Though I know you're not at home

But I can see you-
Your brown skin shinin' in the sun
You got your hair combed back and your sunglasses on, baby
And I can tell you my love for you will still be strong
After the boys of summer have gone

I never will forget those nights
I wonder if it was a dream
Remember how you made me crazy?
Remember how I made you scream
Now I don't understand what happened to our love
But baby, when I get you back
I'm gonna show you what I'm made of

I can see you-
Your brown skin shinin' in the sun
I see you walkin' real slow and you're smilin' at everyone
I can tell you my love for you will still be strong
After the boys of summer have gone

Out on the road today, I saw a BLACK FLAG sticker on a Cadillac
A little voice Inside my head said, "Don't look back. You can never look back."
I thought I knew what love was
What did I know?
Those days are gone forever
I should just let them go but-

I can see you-
Your brown skin shinin' in the sun
You got that top pulled down and that radio on, baby
And I can tell you my love for you will still be strong
After the boys of summer have gone

I can see you-
Your brown skin shinin' in the sun
You got that hair slicked back and those Wayfarers on, baby
I can tell you my love for you will still be strong
After the boys of summer have gone

Only two more days, until your birthday
Yesterday was mine
You'll be turning five
I know what it's like, growing up without your father in your life
So I pretend, I'm doing all I can
And I hope someday you'll find it in your heart

To understand
Why I'm not around
And forgive me for not being in your life

I remember waiting
For you to come
Remember waiting
For you to call
Remember waiting there to find nothing at all
I remember waiting
For you to come
Remember waiting
For you to call
Waiting there to find nothing at all

maybe someday
you really get to know me
not just the letters read to you
I pray I get the chance
To make it up to you
We got a lot of catching up to do

So I pretend, I'm doing all I can
And hope someday you'll find it in your heart

To understand
Why I'm not around
And forgive me for not being in your life

I remember waiting
For you to come
Remember waiting
For you to call
Remember waiting there to find nothing at all
I remember waiting
For you to come
Remember waiting
For you to call
Waiting there to find nothing at all

Forgive me!
I'm so sorry!
I will make it up to you....

30th of April seems like yesterday
bought a house above the ocean where
our kids could laugh and play

i called u from paris to tell you that i
wrote our names on the observation deck
of the Eiffel Tower

Reamember those nights playing "summer wind"
on the jukebox of the bar where we used to go

we made out in the bathroom
and you walked me to my house
i tried to convince you not to go home

if only i had more time
i'd take u where u wanted to go
Italy isnt the same without you here
if only i had one wish
id want a million trillion lifetimes
that i could spend with you
id fall in love with you again and again

1st of novemeber 1998
i was thinking of what to say when i would call
denice come over to my house cause youre the one for me
well drink cheap whine and watch for shooting stars